Thanksgiving my way

For the past few years, since I got divorced, I’ve been lucky enough to have Thanksgiving free to do whatever I want. I don’t host dinner, and my son goes to his dad’s to celebrate with that side of the family. And I make my own plans. Or rather, lack of plans.

My aunt called me a few days ago and asked if I had plans for Thanksgiving. I told her no, and she said they were having a small dinner, just my mom and the family. Now, my aunt means well, but what you have to understand is that she often only tells you half of what she’s thinking and expects you to infer the rest. So I figured implicit in her call was an invitation to dinner, but I really wasn’t sure. Until yesterday, when she texted me to confirm we were coming.

So today I got the rare opportunity to sleep in. (8:15!) I lounged around, drinking coffee and playing on the computer for a while, until it was time to take my son to his dad’s. Then I stopped in at Jewel to pick up a can of mushroom soup for the green bean casserole I was making. I also decided to splurge on scratch-off lottery tickets, since I hadn’t bought any in quite a while.

When I got home, I split the lottery tickets with my boyfriend, and wouldn’t you know it he had the winner. We came out $60 ahead, which is pretty good.

He helped me with the casserole, since I’ve never fried anything before, and I was a little wary to do the onions. (It turned out fantastic, by the way. You can find the recipe here: https://www.bettycrocker.com/recipes/gluten-free-green-bean-casserole-with-fried-onions/74dac433-d6db-46c1-9003-6d7a4d5c03b7)

I even had time to put on makeup, which I rarely find time for any more. I got dressed, and away we went. We got to my aunt’s right on time.

The food was delicious, we spent time with family (including little ones, which is how it always should be), and then we headed home early to spend the evening doing our own things. That’s Thanksgiving the way I like it.

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Insensible Losses

First, you were an idea,

a wondering,

a what-if.

A faraway notion,

intangible.

 

Then–suddenly–

an integral part of my existence.

What I once couldn’t imagine,

now I couldn’t imagine being without.

 

Helpless, needy,

but crucial.

Forever changing my concept

of what would be.

 

How could I think I knew love

before I knew you?

That requisite part of my heart

that keeps it beating.

 

Someday soon

–too soon–

you will go.

I can’t fathom.

 

Yet.

Certain.

And I will be as before–

separate, individual,

lacking.

 

As breath escapes without notice,

so too

does time slip from my grasp

as I watch you grow,

change,

escape.

 

Special thanks to A Way With Words for bringing my attention to the phrase insensible losses.